Monday,Jul 24 2006, 07:00:25 AMOn The Edge

On The Edge

 

Ducking down

to avoid the rage

meant for THEM

but thrown at me

I sit on the edge

 

Hiding behind

fancy poems or

unfinished prose

to escape

pointless conversation

I sit on the edge

 

Watching you suffer

my hand is refused

my love cannot cure

my words salt your wounds

I sit on the edge

 

You think my smiles

are a mockery

of your tormented soul

comfortable

in the company

of its demons

you stay just out of reach

I sit on the edge

 

You mistake me

for a mindless fool

because I choose

not to step in bullshit

You see my strength

as denial

You forget what

connects us

and go to bed

without me

I sit on the edge

 

I sit on the edge

of who I am,

wondering:

should I jump into

the stagnant pool

of hopelessness

just to keep you company?

 

© 2006 Rhonda Lee Richoux

 

Sunday,Jul 23 2006, 07:13:59 AMChanged By Love: A Personal Manifesto

Changed By Love
A Personal Manifesto

I've had bad things happen to me in my life, but I will not use that as an excuse to act badly.

I choose to get my energy from the goodness I've been exposed to. I choose not to feed on the negative forces that have surrounded me at different times in my life.

I choose love over hate, not because I am naive and innocent, but because I've seen what hate does to a soul. I will not have that inside me!

I will respect my elders, because they have tread the path before me and made it easier.

I will respect my peers, because I know we each have our battles to fight, our obstacles to overcome, our heartaches.

I will respect the children and young adults in my life, because they still have to travel the hard parts that are behind me now. I offer myself to them to lead when they need guidance, and to serve when they are broken.

I will live my life as honestly as I can, reflecting daily on my actions and my motives to see if I could have done things differently and achieved a better result. I will always strive for better results, even in those small things that no one else will ever see.

On the other hand....

I will not be so uptight about my life that I forget how to smile, how to laugh, how to forgive, how to apologize, how to rest, how to dance, how to have a water fight, how to love my cat even when I have to scoop up her shit.

I am happy because I choose to be.

I am beautiful because I choose to see myself that way.

I am content to embrace my imperfections. In my youth, I always held myself up to an impossible standard, and set myself up for one failure after another. I refuse to do that to myself ever again.

This life is not long, it is not easy, but it is the only life I have. As Jimi Hendrix once said, "I'm the one that's gotta die when it's time for me to die, so let me live my life the way I want to." (If 6 was 9)

I choose to believe in God, to love my country, to look for the lesson in every trial, to look for the good in every person.

I refuse to be changed by evil. I choose to be changed by love.

Rhonda Lee Richoux 2004