I haven't been on here since forever.

It makes me a little sad though. I just miss someone. ow do you stop missing someone. It seems to be impossible. So much shit has been going on and I DON'T KNOW WHAT i'M DOING. i CAN'T BE ALONE. iT MAKES YOU THINK AND THAT'S THE LAST THING i ever want to be doing. I can't wait for regina.

Today, Kelcie Bunn forced me to go to class. At least she cares about my education but I hate disappointing Liz again. It's sad. Liz seems to think I'm a good student and I keep dropping out and missing classes and she thinks I can do anything she hands to me. Lately, I haven't been able to do anything. I used to be able to write like 10 poems in a day and now I'm lucky if I can do one in 2 weeks. I can't seem to write about anything else other than the constant pain I've been feeling inside for a while now. There's no reason for me to be sad except for living in Sagkeeng, losing friends and it's nobody's fault but my own. Some people might think I'm a good person but I hurt some ex friends of mine that were good to me. I never meant to and I always seem to be saying that. I'm always alone too. My bestfriend lives in Winnipeg and I never get to see him. I have no one to talk to or no one I trust. It's better when you're alone so you don't trust anyone else and you won't get hurt or I won't hurt anyone else I love. I think it's much better when no one knows me and I won't have to care aout anything or anyone else. Maybe it's selfish, I am selfish. I have a mojor flaw, many of them. I'm just me, emotional or maybe I just think too much. Some people might think I'm silly, well I am, but laughter and jokes,sarcasm and all of that is a mechanism to how I really feel. It's better to cry and get mad  when no one is around. Like it's better to sing when I think no one else is listening. Well, anyway thank you to Kelcie for making me go to class, when I finsih school, I might actually be able to leave here. That might give me a different perspective on life.

It's Hard To Say How I Feel Today

I Don't Even Know Where To Begin

How Do I Try To Define What's Within

If Only I Could Have It My Way

I Couldn't Reach For My Shining Star

A Brilliant Star Is What You Are

Here I Am Without You Near

My Loneliness Weighs The World On Me

I Hate How You And I Turned Out To Be

And I Cried My Last Tear

I've Been Holding Onto You

And I Let Go Of What Was True

I Wanted The Whole World To Know

Because Of You I Could Smile

I Felt I Could Live Through All Life's Trials

Since You've Been Gone I've Been Feeling Low

Nothing Has Been The Same

And I Wish I Could Forget Your Name

I Don't Know If I Could Live Through This

The Pain I'm Feeling I've Never Felt Before

This Pain I Don't Want To Feel Anymore

I Died With The Collision Of Your Last Kiss