LIFE IZ FOR LEARNING Monday,Feb 4 2008, 12:43:03 AM(Last updated: Friday,Feb 29 2008, 09:12:10 PM)
****LIFE IZ FOR LEARNING****
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I began to learn life's lessons the same time I was Learning my ABC's,. back in Rock Island, where i received my first taste of things to come. The kids in Hawthorne School were mostly all from low-income families like my own. Their families always expected the best from them at all time. Even under unbalanced odd and adverse conditions the majority put forth just that in the begining. Eventually the Ghetto came out of some; hence you have fights, stealing, etc. That's when mom started to improve her income enough to put me into a learning enviornment where i could grow as a student, without negative outside influence. what Mom never realized, or thought about, was that all the while her son was far away learning a new way to learn, the kids at Hawthorne were picking up on things that would later seem to be very valuable. Especially valuable to someone looking to lead a normal teenage life in the Hood where we still lived
The catholic school I was attending was far from my idea of fun or even interesting for that matter. I couldn't yet see the importance in what i was learning in class. I juss remember that there wasn't anyone with whom to share my feeling on this whole; Catholic Church, Nun, Religion thing",. that i could relate to anywayz,.. not to metion the only Sistaz there were NUNz:( hehe,. Needless to say i was more thanready to get back to Public School when I Graduated Jr. High Nothing could've prepaired me for what Rocky HIGH had in store for me. The girls, the clothes (no more uniformz),the slang ! yea it was like home again !!! Brothaz I hadn't seen since 3rd grade were lookin and acting as if they had aged twice as fast as me. I was a new face to some, but an old friend to others and my freshman year was like a nine-month block party
You can probably guess how my grades were that first year, but i didnt think about it too much. I was catching up on a new education; Street Smarts. Not avaiable in stores!, but i did pay a large fee,(my diploma). I ended up getting kicked out of HS after earnig quite a rep for fights Smokin weed etc. Not only that, some ppl chose not to like me simply beacause i was a new face. Not in any gang or clik, some i became well educated on getting jumped by mobs, untill a few brothaz had to be made examples. I had ppl coming to my front door to fight, just because they thought i wouldn't, but i didn't know that was the reason at the time. See The rule iz to hide any weakness or be tomented by suckaz with nothing better to do. So I had the desire to be the ultimate "Wig SPiltter" And make haters Second-Guess themselves to the point of avoiding fighting me at all costs.
As time passed i found myself fightin only a certain group of ppl and their friends. For a couple summers i found myself fighting on average every other day damn near. Now I feel like i'm twice as old as i am and ppl can notice changes in my behavior. Mom used to teaR up my tapes when they started cursing in rap music. now she couldn't tell you where iwas at any given time. She used to send my uncle and his boys to watch me fight n make sure my back was covered:) The B.S. was never-ending and getting worse when my friendz started to get murdered. This is the hardest thing anyone will have to go through. the number of my friends that have died is sumtimes hard to remember. I have tried to learn a lesson of what to do and what not to do throught he lives of each of these brothaz, and from the wasted lives of their killers. At the time though all i wanted was a gun for my protection. Pretty soon i was looking at a variety.
I will admit there were no attemps on my life while i had these guns, but there were none before i had them either. Along with guns i was smoking weed selling crack, having sex, disrespecting my Mother. I ended up getting into a fight where a guy my age died from hitting his head on the cement, he started it so i got no time. the Streets taught me to fight to kill but i never accually wanted to kill anyone. the lesson i took from that is that harsh penaties come from living without consequence. If you know you're fukin up don't be suprised when punishment falls from the heavens when and where you least expect.
Now that i've graduated two years of Jr. College after going back for my GED, i've worked for the local power company on contact and with several engineering firms as an entry level CAD operator,.. I want you to come any from this story realizing that if someone can go from one extreme to the other and have success then it's possible for anyone who believes in their own capabilities. I want you to be able to say you did it all on your own!
I have mostly all dead people to thank for showing me the roads not to take.
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