Way down in Louisiana, Boudreaux's old lady had been pregnant for some time and now the time had come. So he brought her to the doctor and the
doctor began to deliver the baby. She had a little boy and the doctor looked over at Boudreaux and said, "Hey, Boudreaux! You just had you-self a
son!

Ain't dat grand!"

Boudreaux got excited by this, but just then the doctor spoke up and said,

"Hold on! We ain't finished yet!" The doctor then delivered a little girl.

He said, "Hey, Boudreaux! You got you-self a daughter! She a pretty lil ting, too."

Boudreaux got kind of puzzled by this and then the doctor said, "Hold on, we still ain't got done yet!" The doctor then delivered another boy and
said, "Boudreaux, you just had you-self another boy!"

When Boudreaux and his wife went home with their three children, he sat down with his wife and said, "Mama, you remember dat night what we run
Out of Vaseline and we had to use dat dere tree-in-one Oil?"

His wife said, "Yeah, I do!"

Boudreaux said, "Man, it's a damn good ting we didn't use no WD-forty."

~***~***~***~

~**~***~***~**~

IT Problems....

Another day, another PROBLEM?

What PROBLEM?

Just, you know ……. IT PROBLEMS!!!

This is the age of IT JOKES, my friends.

Enjoy, have a GREAT WEEKEND

and PLEASE DO USE YOUR BRAIN

if you intend to buy any more

PROGRAMMES! Lmao.

Always,

~*~ShAkirA~*~

~**~***~***~**~

Dear Technical Support,

18 months ago, I upgraded to Girlfriend 1.0

from DrinkingMates 4.2,which I had used

for years without any trouble.

However, there are apparently conflicts

between these two products and the only

solution was to try and run Girlfriend 1.0

with the sound turned off.

To make matters worse, Girlfriend 1.0

is incompatible with several other
applications, such as LadsNightOut 3.1,

Football 4.5, and Playboy 6.9.
Successive versions of GirlFriend

proved no better.

I tried a shareware program, Slapper 2.1,

but it had many bugs and left a
virus in my system, forcing me to

shut down completely for several weeks.

Eventually, I tried to run GirlFriend 1.2

and Girlfriend 1.0 at the same
time, only to discover that when

these two systems detected each other
they caused severe damage to my hardware.

I eventually upgraded to Fiancée 1.0,

only to discover that this product
soon had to be upgraded further

to Wife 1.0. While Wife 1.0 tends to use
up all my available resources, it does

come bundled with FreeSexPlus and
Cleanhouse2005.

Shortly after this upgrade, however,

I found that Wife 1.0 could be very
unstable and costly to run.

Any mistakes I made were automatically

Stored in Wife 1.0's memory and

could not be deleted.

They then resurfaced months
later when I had forgotten about them.

Wife 1.0 also has an automatic

Diary, Explorer and E-mail filter, and can,
without warning, launch TurboStrop

and Multi-Whinge.

These latter products have no Help files,

and I have to try to guess what the problem is.

Additional problems are that Wife 1.0

needs updating regularly, requiring
ShoeShop Browser for new attachments

and Hairstyle Express which needs to
be reinstalled every other week.

Also, when Wife 1.0 attaches itself to my
Audi Sport hard drive,it often crashes.

Wife 1.0 also comes with an

irritating pop-up called MotherInLaw,

which can't be turned off.

Recently I've been tempted to install

Mistress 2003, but there could be
problems.

A friend of mine has alerted me to

the fact that if Wife 1.0 detects

Mistress 2003, it tends to delete

all of your Money before uninstalling itself.

Help requested please !

~**~***~***~**~

~***~*****~***~

MAY GOD BLESS US ALL!

AMEEN.

This IS A JOKE.

NO WAY DARE I “MOCK” GOD.
ALIF LAAM MEEN. AMEEN.

The bottom line is
GOD blessed us all with BRAINS,
the ability to THINK,
hence to CHOOSE,
and to DECIDE how
we choose to ACT.

I find that the JOKE
makes me think
how OFTEN EVERY NIGHT
do couples use
“HEADACHES”
as a “valid” excuse to refuse
to make love to their spouse.

Little do they know that
SCIENTICALLY PROVEN,
whenever a couple makes love,
the BRAIN will automatically release
ENDORPHIN, the “HAPPY HORMONE”,
hence it is PROVEN,
that it is actually a pain release,
and magically, your headaches
or chronic pains that
you are having will just
DISAPPEAR!

As a matter of fact,
although it is forbidden by most religions
to make love when
the female is having her menses,
it has AGAIN BEEN PROVEN
that due to the role of ENDORPHIN,
most menstrual pains
can be relieved!

I am in no circumstances,
encouraging couples to make love
when the female partner is having menses,
just stating a FACT.

NO ONE CAN EVER JUSTIFY A SIN!
as
ALIF LAAM MEEN!
GOD KNOWS BEST!

Be blessed, happy and safe always.

Always,

~*~ShAkirA~*~

~***~*****~***~

GOD AND ADAM

One day, God and Adam were walking in the Garden of Eden.

God told Adam that it was time to populate the Earth.

"Adam, you can start by kissing Eve."

"Lord, what is a kiss?" asked Adam.

God explained, and then Adam took Eve behind the bush and kissed her.

A little while later, Adam returned with a big smile and said,

"Lord! That was great! What's next?"

"Adam, I now want you to caress Eve."

"Lord, what is caress?" asked Adam.

God explained, then Adam took Eve behind the bush and caressed her.

A little while later, Adam returned with a big smile and said,

"Lord that was even better than a kiss! What's next?"

"Here is what gets the deed done. I now want you to make love to Eve."

"Lord, what is make love?" asked Adam.

God explained, then Adam took Eve behind the bush.

A few seconds later, Adam returned and asked,

"Lord, what is a headache?"