Journals
Saturday,Jun 26 2004, 05:37:04 PMdate: 27 june 2004 time: 01:47 location:
date: 27 june 2004 time: 01:47 location: kl home
Waaaaarrrrrhhhhhhh..........gonna start class nex monday...not tat i hate goin bac..but thinking tat all those assignments and tests that are awaiting me with open arms....i'm scared....miss home so much aledi....wanna stay here n relax more!!!! (-_-)" uuuummmm............
26 june...sis birthday...14 yrs old aledi....wishing her HAPpY BIRTHDAY!! buy her a pounch and a shirt as birthday presents...she love it...i'm happpy that she love it...(^_^)P hehehe.....
nite nite....sleepy aledi....
Thursday,Jun 24 2004, 07:48:53 PMdate : 25 june 2004 time : 03:03 ...
date : 25 june 2004 time : 03:03 location : kl home
Start working on asgm aledi...hehe...got the initiative and strenght aledi...hehehe ^^ so gambate to me!!! keep up the good work...yeah! (^o^)Y wish me luck in everything.......
I dunno know whether what i'm feeling now is right or not? even though ppl always say tat there's no right o wrong in a relationship.....this been hapen before long long time ago....i tot i aledi get through wit it aledi...but...."sigh"
I never tell this 2 anybody before...but..juz feel like dropping out 2day...S..a guy that i had crush on when i was in last few months of standard 5...duno why tat would happen...but...when it comes..its had 2 tell rite? for me...he was always there 4me....always take care of me without telling out how...he always help me with my homeworks...always do my maths 4me...hahaha :P (i hate maths alots by tat time...kill me rather than me doin math..but i still got an A's !! ) he would always tell me everything bout him....at that time..every week..teacher would take us to library to watch video o borrow books..then he would always sit wit me at the librarian counter and both of us would share junks at there..hahaha..miss tat time now.....
When v juz start standard 6...he sat bside me..i was trill of coz..but nobody noe...well..tat time..3 person sitting in a row...a girl tat like him...oso sitting at our row too...but..he had said b4 tat he dun hv feeling 4 tat gal...n i believe him....the world is still the same..whenever he finish his math...he would definately keep4me to copy 1st..nobody else could had 1st...( i threat him 2let me copy 1st..if not i wont let him copy my english n B.M) hahaha....so..as time pass by...i feel tat..thatz my rights...priority tat he gave me...
Still remember...it was on 17 of march 1996...he call me at 6 something in the morning..he ask me 2tel teacher tat he wont be at school for morning time..bcoz he wanted to go do I.C. n wanted me 2help him collect hw...so when i got 2sch n tell...everyone was teasing me...i was blushing by tat time...they say tat there was something on between me n him....but of coz..i would not admit it..from wat i noe..he had feeling 4 a gal in my class...i wasnt really sad at tat time...still feel happy tat he was by my side....in mid of life in standard6...v change classroom...he was apart from me...sitting nex row from me..his best pal was sitting bside me tat time n another guy..hahaha..a funny n cute guy...but at least i can still c him...life still goes on as usual....i still remember..at tat time...i'm the only one who could bully him without getting scold by him...if other...he would show out his black face..hahaha..then the person would scare like hell...so everyone always ask me to take revenge 4them on him.....hahahahaha......
1997 broke in quickly without us noticing...v are really apart for this time....he went to a private chinese secondary sch...i went to a public girl secondary sch...i was abit sad..most sad is tat i was apart from my gang tat time..i was feeling lonely at the new sch..i feel like there's no one who knows me was there4me...then one day..a few weeks after new sch started...he called me...i was excited to hear his voice....and v tok...tok none-stop..i told him how unhappy i am..how i feel..always everytime he call..i would tell him the same..n everytime..he would say " change sch la...come 2my sch here...then u wont feel bad lo" i was really touch by tat time....but i told him " no way! u now how i much i dislike chinese..so hard4me to stay away from chinese n now u wan me to go bac again?no way!" n he...well..he would juz laugh..think bac now..when he call..he would mostly listen 2me talking...sometimes when i was in terrible mood..he called..i would scold him4 no reason...yet he would take it..let me scold out everything..then he would ask " ok aledi?enough?can v start our talking now?" after hearing tis...i would hahaah...laugh..of coz...i tel my gang at secondary bout tis..they say"how come there's an idiot tat would let u scold 4 no reason? so stupid?" deep down in my heart...it was nothing near to idiot or stupid..itz the sweetest things that one would done 4me...n i really cherrish this.. secondary life passed by peacefully with him talking to me all the time until one year..where everything change.........
Form4...My best pal...who is always same primary b4 told me tat she saw him with a gal...holding hands together...tat time..in juz 3 days we'll held the 4th primary reunion....i was hurt when i was told by tat news..no wonder he hardly call me at tat time....but..y wouldnt he told me tat he got a gf? i tot...i was the one tat he tok 2 when he was happy or sad...i was hurt mostly tat i'm not the 1st person who know bout his relationship.. then on reunion day...v go 2gether...i ask him about it..in usual tone...he like avoiding it...it hurts more by then....by wouldnt he wanna tell me o tok2me bout it...is the the one tat been calling me n talk 2me bout life and everything? is he still the same boy tat i noe?? since then...v hardly call each other n tok..things started to loss off.....v only call when there was reunion gonna b held..yet..strangely v can still chat like usual..but avoiding the relationship part...juz mayb..he doesnt like 2tok bout relationship huh?
End of secondary life...n here comes 2002...he n his gf are still 2gether..i wish them happiness..but..im abit sad..bcoz tis time...v really arent close anymore..im not important anymore...v didnt call anymore..even call..didnt chat much too...in 2004 may...there was a reunion at my hse...v bump into each other on9..v tok..told him bout the reunion n he promise he'll call n tok bout it...when v were on9..4the 1st time..he did tok bout him n his gf...i had been keepin up wit his news all the time...i noe tat she had went to overseas to study n the course would took her 4 yrs time...he was sad...he told me tat she wont b comin bac tis yr..n he wanted 2save money so tat he could go n visit her...i ask him once"wil u wait 4her?" he say"yes" i ask"y?bcoz u love her?" he say"yes" i was abit abit sad when he really confess it..but nothing much...bcoz at tat time...i was aledi couple wit Honey...a guy tat care n treasure me like a princess ^^ i pray 4him...pray tat she would not break his heart...i would not wan 2 c him heartbroken..... so tat nite at 1 something mornin..he call n v chat 4 an hour and a half...but i could feel tat...the closeness is not there anymore...im outside his world now...the only one in it was her...the precious girl of him....once again..i was dissapointed...i tot..at least..im ur fren....but....
2 weeks after the reunion..which he didnt show up bcoz of replacement classes.....midnite wit a bad mood...i miss call him...duno y..until now...sometimes..when i feel hopelessly sad..he is stil the 1st person i think of..so i miss call him...i tot he was asleep...but after a few mins he miss call me bac...i was actually "happy" but tat juz all...i dun dare 2 send sms o miss call him again...the second nite...i send him a friendship sms...n he miss call me bac...i was happy tat he would still take me in as fren..then things went bac 2 normal..without miss call or sms......
yesterday nite....i left my hp in the living room...i was busy doin things...when i retrieve my hp...i saw a miss call..it was him....i was surpize n trill abit..n i miss call him bac..n he..oso miss call me bac..haha...funny..my mood was happy....juz now..at around 2:15am...i send him a forward sms..i tot he was really asleep..as he was having class 2molo...but tis time..he send me a forward sms too...telling tat he would never 4get me.......i look n look n look at tat sms...n i was happy...i guess...no matter how old i am..he would still remain in my heart...in a place juz 4him long time ago...
i noe...he's juz a person tat stay in my heart only..honey is the one tat i love now....bcoz..whenever i was sad....honey is the 1st person i wish to be by my side..even when i tot bout HIM sometimes...in juz second..Honey would pop into my mind...n i would actually feel glad tat honey was in my life.........so...life still goes on......love still rose up...........
Wednesday,Jun 23 2004, 05:08:33 PMdate : 26 june 2004 time : 01:07 location :...
date : 26 june 2004
time : 01:07
location : kl home
holidaying now....even so..still feel tired and rush bout life...what is wrong wit life nowadays?is there any life which is slow & smooth?? "sigh"..................
Honey juz got bac at 22:30 juz now...goin bac to jb....he come here on monday then went for briefing on tuesday....almost whole day it took him......well...at least i can sl\ent more time with him ^^ kinda happy like tat.....everytime...when feeling sad...he will be the one who can cheer me up most............2day...went out wit honey whole day.. v went to watch 'Riddick' nice movie.....wow.......the main actor...wow..hahaha... :P did something terrible 2day...i didnt mean to show honey "black" face...but couldn't help it.....he hardly care much bout me 2day...keep thinking bout his own things only....feel neglect... :"( he did ask me y..but i didnt tell him the real reason really....gonna tell him sooner o later...coz v aledi promise to tell each other everything....i stil believe tat honesty is the best way to maintain relationship...rite?? hehe.....
well......yesterday nite....went dinner with my best pals...of coz honey follow oso ^^ after eat...well.....v tok to Y about her relationship....eventhough v know tat relationship is 2 ppl things..but if Y is suffering from this relationship....v feel hurt too.......v juz wanna her to be happy......actually is both ppl prob!!! Y duno whether the guy really like her then b wit her o wat..yet she dun ask....choose to avoid..n the guy....didnt tel her the reason y he dun wan their relationship to be known by public......then after comfort n talking to her....(abit like scolding her actually....) then when she go bac..she call him...n tell him how she feel......then 2day...the guy reply her bac..tell her the reason.....everything is fine...n v r happy for her...but to tell the truth....i still DISLIKE the GUY!!!!!! y? he actually tell Y tat dun let us influence her??? JERK!@!@ wat v r doin is saving ur relationship n yet you try to piss on us? who r u to piss on.....JERK!!!! still feel so unfair.....v r trying our best 2help her n he??eeerrrr........i'll tel honey then u get the consequence..............JERK!!!!!
Sunday,Jun 13 2004, 12:34:29 PMJuz become a part of zorpia today..coz of...
Juz become a part of zorpia today..coz of Imi...haha..my ex uni mate..she's at shah alam there taking law course..her sis juz got married last sunday..HapPy Wedding~~~ hope she n her hubby will have a wonderful relationship..hehe..this few days juz busy with my mid term exams and assignment...panda eyes more darker than ever...(sigh)....but mid term break comin soon...hahaha...will have alot alot alot of sleep by then!! stay around............