Journals
Monday,Jan 16 2006, 06:47:23 AMbeen a while..
well.. been a long time since i wrote in here.. i was out with dez (as you all know) but im back.. guess its just a bit boring now.. nothing to do.. nothing to write about.. been kinda down lately.. not sure why to be honest.. nothing is horribly wrong.. just stressed out i suppose.. i applied for a job.. hoping to get it maybe.. if not.. i will keep searching.. i might REALLY need one soon.. money.. its so funny.. life seems ruled by the little slips of paper dosent it? i like the people who say "you dont need money to make it, or to be happy" ever notice the people saying that have money given to them? lol.. they have no idea how it is without it you know? i am just getting tired of things.. i keep most inside.. bottled up.. because if i let ANY of it out, its like starting a war.. i suppose its my own fault, for how i bring it up, or what it is im thinking you know? i just wish i didnt have so many problems with things.. i wish i could just be that leaf that fell in the river.. just going with the flow.. no matter where it goes.. im just like the rock in that river.. seems im parting everything.. making it all go around me you know? i wish i could just roll along with things.. oh well.. i guess i will get out of this depression eventually.. i always do.. just seems so heavy now though.. heavier than it used to be.. i can bare it.. but.. its paper thin to the point where i cant bare it.. then what happens?.. guess we will see huh? lol Been talking to dez.. well not tonight.. or last night.. but a few nights ago.. were okay, things are good.. i love her so much.. just had a conversation with someone about me and dez.. how we met and all.. i love talking about it.. guess im always worried about an end though.. not that i have a reason to be.. just who i am.. im a person that worries... all the time.. no matter what lol.. anywho, later zorpies!
Tuesday,Jan 10 2006, 08:04:04 AMLove in Pure Form
Well i am back home.. and alone again :( but my god!!! desiree is just.. she takes my breath away.. and she dosent give it back lol.. she is so beautiful, i mean just look! how the hell did i get a girl like her??? i dunno.. but at times.. i dont even want to know.. i will just call it "dumb luck" and hope that luck never ever runs out.. she is my life support.. her soft skin and beautiful eyes.. her sexy legs and cute hair.. god.. how i need her in my life.. how she IS my life.. im just filled with a bliss i cant explain.. to hold my world in my arms.. no words can describe that raw emotional feeling.. even when i smile so big.. and i get that dreamy look in my eyes.. its still only half as happy as i am on the inside.. she can make my heart beat like i have ran miles by only touching my chest.. god how i already miss that.. i miss it so much.. its 3:57 am.. im still on dez's time though.. she just hung up with me.. i cried when she did.. i hate the phone sometimes.. but i love the voice that comes through it more than i love anything in this world.. i love you so very much desiree lynn best.. and i swear to you, that i will never leave you.. i will never abandon you, never harm you, never do anything that would make you feel unlike the princess and angel you are.. you deserve better than me.. but since you seem to think i am good enough (yea right lol) i will do everything to make you feel as beautiful and perfect as you truly are.. (dont argue baby, you are beautiful and absolutly perfect in every way!) but here are some pics here, of how perfect we look together (hehe, dont we though?) I LOVE YOU DESIREE BEST!!!!
