Journals
Sunday,Nov 23 2003, 02:01:00 PMnot happy now.
not happy now.
Tuesday,Nov 18 2003, 04:43:00 AMhehe~ he called me~ i m happy~ *so stupid,...
hehe~ he called me~ i m happy~
*so stupid, how can my mood be manipulated so easily... ><*
aigh... i know what u mean cindy... i know this is what i MUST do too... that is what i always advice my friends when they are in this kind of situation... but... its not that easy to actually DO it ga mah... esp this is the first time this is happening to me... >_< if i really have someone to CHASE me... if i hv more people to CHASE me like Jo does... then i dun hv to be so desperate la... hahaha... so stupid me... so yeung sui... =~=
Saturday,Nov 15 2003, 02:39:00 PMAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH AAAAA
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH
HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH
HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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AH-AH-AAAAAAHHHHHH
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gone crazy...? no... just... just... the truth is just a bit shocking... he... he.....
he said he dint like me that much at first... not that he DOESNT like me but just not as much... (?) but then now he really likes me wor... O_O u say... what is that... what is that... what is that!!!!! dammit i SHOULD NEVER HAVE TOLD HIM that i like him... >< DAMN!!! i am so DAMN STUPID!!! no wonder he told me that he likes her... and that he likes BOTH!!! DAMN GREEDY PASTA!!!
and he said i was the one chasing him?? W-T-F!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I DID NOT!!!! Damn... so YEUNG SUI!!!! GUHHHHHH =~= i so feel like DYING... >O<
and he said he has gone quite deep now and is hard to find his way out... and me too... altho i was just starting to get into it... huh... so i said... ok then... maybe we can try to go on... see what happens...
Anyway, I-HATE-HIM!!!!!
Friday,Nov 14 2003, 09:54:00 PM�...... 我需n一點中文思考... 不會看
唉...... 我需要一點中文思考... 不會看中文的人真是對不起了... (oh... sorry... apology to people who cannot read chinese... cus i serisouly need some chinese thinking...)
我... 真的不知道應該怎樣做... 其實我很清楚知道他不是我想要的... he is not what i need... i appreciate him, i like him... but NOT relationship-wise... *sigh* 我不能說他經歷的比我少﹐他的成長歷程其實比我更多難受的事 (其實我也只是有一些難受的事罷了)﹐理論上...... 他應該比我更成熟世故... 但每個人都是不同的... 也許他有經驗﹐但缺乏思考引導者... (我真的覺得我媽教了我很多思考上的事... 令我對很多事的想法都較正面... 但同時也偏向不相信人... or u can say 猜疑?)
總之... 思想上我們有頗多的差異... 對不同事情的看法﹐觀點﹐人生的價值觀等... 都有距離... 而... 我不認為雙方應該為了另外一方而改變自己的看法﹐因為各自的觀點是從他們的人生經驗中得到的... 這是可以隨便 / 輕易改變的嗎? 難道要對方否定自己的過去來迎合自己嗎? 這當然是不可能的事... 至少﹐我覺得這是不對的。
當然﹐我不是說為自己認為重要的人改變是不對的﹔經過思考的認同 / 價值觀改變當然是值得鼓勵的﹐可那要是盲目的認同﹐那就不是甚麼好事了...... (當然﹐這完全是我的觀點﹔我相信世界上有很多人會非常歡迎盲從的... but thats not me)
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繼續說...... 對了, 剛剛在說 mind distance... and i was talking about one should not change easily because of the other... cus... that would be like... the person is indecisive and does not have his/her own stand... and for me that is kinda NOT what i want for my "other half"...
damn... i forgot about what i wanted to say already... fine screw it.
Friday,Nov 14 2003, 05:17:00 AM*sigh* i dont know... i am feeling sad......
*sigh*
i dont know... i am feeling sad... haha... maybe i should wake up earlier... (and i think this is early enough) sad... i think i should accept the reality... he is not... he is NOT the one... i should say a clear... Very Clear NO to him...
is he merely stupid? no... i think there is something implied behind his stupidity... not that he DELIBERATELY do things to make me sad and make me realize that "implied" meaning... its just something that he doesnt realize himself that i think i should have realized a long time ago...
i dont know... i dont think i can say what stupid thing he has done to make me feel so bad... but it is just the best joke anyone can get in the WORLD... as lil-piggy said... hahaha... if i keep on tolerating his stupidity... haha... i dun think that would be something i can stand for a long term...
but should i just give up simply bcos of his stupidity? there HAS to be someone who tells him what is the right thing to do... or else... his OTHER/FUTURE girl friends will still suffer... :( i do wanna bring him positive influence and if i cant give him anything, at least make him more mature... (like i can do that) but i really... really... doubt... if i can do that...
*sigh* i wanna cry... but then its not worth it... i am not gonna do that... or mayb i will cry n let him know... hehe, to make him regret? no... stupid people wont realize the stupid things they do... or even if he does... what can he do? huh... like i care...
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i... what do i want to say? i dont remember tim... O_O aigh... gum... forget it la...