my life :)

Sat, 23 Aug 2008 11:43 EDT

dont know what to say but i feel i want to write anything

inside me so many things i dont to understand it

dont know if its better for me to be all alone or to love and be loved

to have so many friends or to have just one or two

to trust on ppl and beleve what they say or deal with ppl that they all liers

so many tims or i can say all the time all i wish to get back in time for 20 or 22 years to be just a kid dont know that this world have all this lies and liers and cheatin and all the bad things that grown-up ppl always do

so many times i ask allah to take my soul i just wanna die or live alone dont want to talk or know anyone even my own family

i know that this words seems so sad but am not sad

i dont feel anything anymore

why ppl are that bad

why all of us dont care if we hurt eachother or say things or do things will hurt other ppl but we simply dont care

when i was a little kid life was so great

just being dont understand anything seems like the greatest feeling in this world

all i want from this life is feel relax and peace of mind

but almost all the time i dont feel this things

sometimes i feel i am a real crazy person my head will be expload from all that thoughts on my mind hundred thoughts? no maybe thousands :)

i just want to be happy

is this a big thing to ask?

i dont know why am writing all of this by the way :D

but i want to get it out thats all

but there is one good thing that will make me feel happy

do you know what is it?

being near to ALLAH

really we all dont have but ALLAH

pray for me plz that ALLAH forgive me and help me and save my soul from hell i love ALLAH so much but i dont deserve to be his searvent coz i am so lazy i dont do what i have to do

but ALLAH is the greatest and the mercifull he will forgive me isa i am sure

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my life :)