things runing throu my mind don't know wat to do don't know wat to say i'm on the virg of losing it tearin this mutha up i'm pissed off slightly physcotic toOk da pen stabb my arm blood on my face tears coming out of my eyes i'm so tempted yet so confussed not knowing wat to do where to turn my life just tunrned up side down god forbid i lose it all hell breaks loose my mind is corrupted full of hate lost hopes faded dreams get the thoughts of sinners out my head why can't i live without my mind tourmenting me day to day wat did i do to deserve this everyone tells me theres a light at the end of the tunnel but i can never reach it, its too dark everythings fading away its all blist n black all my feelins for u has turn to hate i'd give everything just eas my pain one night without darkness the pain the hate i'm drowning in a pit of blood someone stop the yelling in my head the screamings r getting louder i can't take it no more my tears turn to blood in this dark corner i wheep my life is a misory there's no end to the dark everything is falling in its place i have finally accpeted my life as it is the screaming the yellin the tourment its all....me

There's alot of girls in the world but one that u really love.
you pay most of your attention to her but what does she do for you ?
she smiles, she'll bitch, she'll wine but what does she do for u ?
I love her, I hate her  but i don't know what to really feel for her.
She's beautiful, she's kind but she never pays any attention to you.
What does she do for you ?
I'm kind, i'm sweet, I write her poems and love letters she never writes back.
Why should i care if she doesn't ? why do I even waste my time on her ?
Could I really love her or do I just love her to hate her ?
do I love her to hurt her ?
I'm just in pain why doesn't she see how  much i feel for her ?
I'm sick n tired of this I need to move on wit my life.
I can't be in love with her anymore, my love for her has come to an end.

                       He was only ten months old.The sweettess lil baby i ever knew.

                             he never cried always with a smile on his face.

                                    no one knew the pain he felt inside.

                                              he was always so happy.

                            everytime you saw him he just lit up like an angel.

                                      no one knew was really crying inside.

                          If you were sad and you saw him smile it just brighten your day.

                                                   he was on top of the world.

                                              we all saw a bright future for him.

                                            no one knew it would end so quickly.

                                         The life of a baby was taken in an instant.

                                       he went not knowing what was happening to him.

         before he left this earth forever he smiled gently one last time and his first  word was mama,

                                              and he left this earth forever.

                                                        R.I.P SANJAY.

                                        February 2, 1999 - November 14,1999