To JeSuS i sUrRenDeR..
i lUk bAcK aT tHe dAyS n I dIn knEw i WuD bE cRyInG fOr tHe
bEaUtIfUl mOmEnTs i LivEd fOr. i WiSh timE CuD rOlL bAcK...
yEaH iTs tRuE wHeN pEoPlE sAy lUb hUrTs. oFcOsE iT hUrTs
wHeThEr iTs fRoM ur lUbeR,uR pArEnTs,uR clOsE fRen oR ur sIsTeR
u hAf oWaYs sTaNd fOr!!
  I oWaYs  sToOd tHeRe fOr hEr. i ScReWeD uP mY rEpuTaTiOn fOr her.
i BeCaMe tHe bAd oNe fOr hEr n LeT hEr rEmAiN aT tHe cLoUdS sO
pUrE aNd tO gReAtEr hEigHts. I dId SmAlL sTuFfs tO mAkE hEr hApPy
jUs tO sEe a sMilE oN hEr fAcE..i sToOd iNfRoNt oF hEr sO tHat tRoUblEs
wOuLdnT tRembLe hEr sOfT hEaRt.....
  wE ...owaYs bEeN tOgEthEr sInCe tHe pAsT 17 yEaRs aNd nOw u dO tHiS.i WiSh wE wERe kIdS tHen.
.u TriEd sTabBinG mE wIf tHe kNiFe oNli fOr a lIl mIsTaKe...OnLi fOr a dRoP Of wAtEr, tHe bRiCk u ThreW fOr mE,
wHeN i wAs sIcK u wUd pLuCk aLl mY hAiR ..So mUmMy aNd dAdDy hAd
tO sHaVe mY wHolE hEaD..ThOse wErE oNli a mIsChIeF oF a KiD.
  nOw tHaT u R oReAdY gRoWn up u dUn hAf nO sEnSe wUt oThErS hAf bEen gOiNg tHrU..fOr tHe sAkE oF sAvInG tHe tEaRs oF hIs eYeS u mAdE me cRy tHe tEaRs oF bloOd. iNsPiTe oF kNoWiNg hOw mUcH i hAtE tO wAit, u MaDe mE sTaNd uNdEr tHe sUn fOr hoUrS aNd WhEn u rEtUrN
hOmE u MaKe tHe mOsT sTuPiD rEaSoN i EvEr hEArD..iF u tElL a kId oSo hE wUdNt bElIeF. iNspItE oF kNoWiNg sMaLl sTuFfS oSo sTuCk iN mY hEaD tHeRe u gO aGaIn sHoWiNg uR  fOoLisHnESs..i FaInTeD, i WeNt nUmB..i CrIeD fOr hOuRs, i hAd sLeEplEsS nIgHts oUt oF fEaR.BUT U  NEVER CARED!! aFtEr mAkIng sUcH a hUgE mIsTaKe tHeRe u dIsapPeAr
aGain iN tHe cOlD mOrNiNg...how mAnY tImEs hAd i TolD u nOt tO dIsappEaR thAt daY , u nEvA hEaRd mE. AM I a  BLOODY MOTHERFUCKING CHATTING MACHINE ? DUN MY WORDS COUNT AT ALL? I wAs sTaNdIng tHeRe wAiTiNg fOr hEr. i CaNt eVeN sTaNd a sEcOnD iN dArK aNd tHeRe i StOoD fOr hEr iN tHe dArK colD rAiN..
mY sKiRtS wErE aLl wEt aNd i WaS shIvErIng wIf cOlD aNd fEaR..i TriEd  hEr hP sO mAnY tImEs iT wAs oK aT fIrSt..n tHen sHe sWiTcHed iT oFf.
tHe fUcK sHe wAs rUnNinG aWaY fRoM mE. i Was sO cLoSe tO hEr oWayS. i ShArEd eVeRy liL sTuFfS wIt hEr..iTs dIfF sHe nEvA pOuReD hEr hEaRt oUt. "mY wOrDs dUn cOuNt fOr hEr" tHiS fUcKiNg lInEs
rUnNing iN mY mInD iS dRiViNg mE cRaZy
   sHe iS hAfInG tHe bEsT tImE wIt tHe oNe sHe wAnTs tO bE wIf.bUt iF lUb iS sO sElFiSh fOr hEr tHeN i SaY" dO hElL wIf tHiS fUcKin sO cAlLed lUB". i Am wAiTiNg, WaIting n WaItIng n sHe dun gIf a fUcK aBoUt It. aNd wUt aBoUt tHe fUcKiNg gUy? hE iS sEeInG oNli hIs lUb,nOt hiS fAmIlY nO nOtHing..tHe fUcK hE cAllS mE hIs on-nI...wHeN hE
nEvEr cArEd. hE dOeS wUt hE wAnnA dO wUt hE lIkeS tO..iF i SaY aNy tHiNg hE wUd bE iN tEaRs.
   FUCK U BOTH RETARDS. I HAF NOTHING TO SAY TO HIM AS HE IS
NOT NOT NOT THE PERSON WHO UNDERSTANDS ME. BUT WUT ABOUT HER? WE HAF BEEN LIVING TOGETHA FOR SO LONG. ONE THING I CAME TO KNOW THAT IS NO MATTER HOW MANY YEARS U HAF LIVED TOGETHA ITS NOT IMP ONLI A SECOND CAN BRING CHANGES. THE LUB I GAVE TO HER IS VALUEESS AND THE LUB HE
GIVES IS PRICELESS UH!! I SPOKE SLANGS WHEN EVA GUYS WUD
TRY TEASING. I BECAME THE WRONG ONE. I SPOKE SLANGS, I FOUGHT, I GOT INJURED, I BECAME THE GANGSTRESS...
     BuT sHe nEvA cArEd ..Now i wRiTe tHiS shIt wIf tHe sAddEsT mUsIc
oN mY hEaDpHonE, wIf tEaRs iN mY eYeS..WELL ShE DUN GIF A FUCK
ABOUT ME..i lUbEd hEr sO mUcH n nOw a mAn cOmes n she lEfT. i m NoT sAyIng sTaY..i SaY cArE aS i do. wHen u r WiF hIm u nEvA tHiNk aBoUt mE..Me tHe oNe wHo waS tHeRe fOr aLl ThEse yEarS..u Dun eVeN cArE
wHeThEr i CrY, i aM sCaRed, i M sUffOcAtInG, I m DyEiNg wItHiN mYsElF....
   I AM NOT HAPPY TO BE RUDE TO OTHERS , TO BREAK THEIR PURE LITTLE HEARTS..TO SPEAK FOUL LANGUAGE, TO FIGHT, TO BE VOILENT..BUT I AM WASTING MY TIME HERE TRYING TO CALM MY HEART. I HAF NOTHING TO SAY..U MADE THE SAME MISTAKE AGAIN AND AGAIN..AND U EXPECT ME TO BE LIKE JESUS WHO FORGAVE EBERYTIME..THIS TIME I AM TOTALLY BROKEN.. THOUGH WE WILL BE TOGETHER ..BUT IN REAL I WONT HAF THE SAME FEELINGS AS I USED TO HAVE..I WONT be ABLE TO FORGIVE U EVER IN MY LIFE..THIS SHIT WILL OWAYS REMAIN IN MY HEART AS A PART OF IT. I SAY IT LOUD, CLEAN AND CLEAR I WONT EVER FORGIVE U. I WAS OWAYS PROUD TO BE UR....AND OWAYS PRAYED TO GOD WE WOULD OWAYS BE TOGETHER IN EVERY BIRTH. BUT NOW I PRAY I WOULD NEVA GET A PERSON LIKE U AS MY SISTER. NOW THAT U CRY OR WUTEVA IT WONT GIVE A FUCK TO MY HEART. I MAY CRY WHEN U CRY BUT I EVEN CRY WHEN I LISTEN TO SAD SONG OR WATCH MOVIE..SO WUTS THE DIFF? TEARS ARE JUS TEARS.. I cANT EVEN HATE HER..COS I DUN HATE PEOPLE , HATE CAN TURN INTO LUB SOMEDAY WHICH I DUN WANT....BE HAPPY WIF THE FUCKING PERSON U WANT TO BE WIF. DUN EXPECT ANY THING FROM ME..AS IF U HAF EVER FULFILLED MY EXPECTATIONS....
   AND NOW TO THIS DAY WHETHER JESUS HANG ME TO PURGATORY FOREVER OR WUTEVER AS IF I GIVE A FUCK
   I PRAY THE LORD TO FORGIVE ME FOR MY SINS..MY GREATEST SIN TO BE A SISTER...TO LUB MY SISTER...

Admittedly, I’m not a good listener and I’ve got a short span of attention. The people who matter to me would claim that I’m the best listener in the world because that’s the way in which it works – I’d always give my best to the ones that I love and care for. The best of me and no less. Sometimes, I’m too blunt for my own good. I can be hypocritical at times and I think people who claim that they hate hypocrites are being hypocritical themselves since everybody must have at least been hypocritical at one point of time in their lives. I dislike small talks but ironically, most of the time, I deal with small talks very well. I resent girls who preach about gender equality and then they expect the guy to pay on the first date. I resent guys who are too cocky.I am oways hanging my cam around my neck or wuteva.I jus cant help myself to click the pictures, thats jus me.If not pictures then oways busy wit music. I enjoy dealing with guys who try to mindfuck me because almost all the time, I’d end up mindfucking them instead.Well my frens claim they cant deal wit words wit me cos em a gemini u see i got answer and questions both at same time oways.I play wit words safe, I’m a sucker for the truth, even if it’s the brutal truth. I don’t live my life by “What ifs” anymore cos somewhere along this life, I’ve finally found my guts to live and let live. I still prefer sunny days to rainy days. I live by short term plannings cos long term planning restricts and life’s too short to focus on just a few things. I’m so in love with life with the love of my life. I’ve realized that he’s my true love and I want him to be mine forever. At the moment…well, there’s soo little time and there’s just soooo many things to do!!!