a boy goes to see a cabaretdance.

His mum goes angry and asks him:Did u see anything there that you were not supposed to see?

Boy: yes,i saw my dad!

 

Santa Sigh: can you  spell a word that has more than 1000 words?

yes!it`s a post office

 

 school;where pappa pays and son plays.

 life insuranse:a contact that keeps you poor at all

life,so that you can die a rich.

Nurse: a personwakes up to give you sleepin pills.

Marriage:a contact in which a boy loses his bachelor degrees and girl gets her master  degree.

 

 

human brain is most autstanding thing.

it functions 24 hours and 365 days.

it functions right the day we born.

and it stops only when we either enter inside the exam hall.

 

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do you know the full form of wife?

 w-wonderful

i-item

f-for

e-enterteinment

the real meaning of girl

g-ghost

i-in

r- real

l-life

girls are incomplete without boys

woman has a man in it,

mr has mr in it,

female  has male in it,

madam has Adam in it,

so girl are alwaysincomplete without boys.

 

why gods stay in heaven?

because they  are afraid of what they  have created!

ttutuyugf

 american life style

consequences of American life style:

The wife rushed into house screaming:darling,come quick!your kids and my kids are beating our kids!

 

figure like cooke bottle

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Hubby:darling,

years ago you had a figure like coke bottle.

Wife:yes darling i still do,only difference is that earlier itwas 300ml now it`s 1.5ltr 

 

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when you feel lonely,

can`t see anyone around you,

the world seems to be fading away,

come along with me,

i`ll take you to the eye specialist.

god made you

god made a daylight and it`s called the sun,

god made an enterteinment and it`s called  the fun,

god  made a nightlight and it`s called the star,

god made a youand it`s calledCartoon

Drink beer with chicken fry.....

next generetion child will sing:

Twinkle twinkle little star,

i just went to royal bar,

 whisky rates are up so high,so drink beer with chicken fry.

 

 

 

talking about oxygen

life without you is impossible,

you are my breath and  blood.

i can`t stay for a second without youif you aren`t there i`m dead,

hey!hello i`m talking about OXYGEN

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what happens when lion roars thrice?

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-

-

-

-

think

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-

-

-

any guess?

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-

-

-

ok,well i`ll tell you...

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-

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tom &jerry cartoon begins.:)

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what is the opposite of dominoes?

 what is the opposite of dominoes?

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-

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domi doesn`t know!

shut up!

shut up

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S=suprises  for you

H=happiness for you

U=ulimited love for you

T=true passion for you

U=u always in my mind

P=praying for you

so....again shut up!

a chinese question:

a chinese pair Mr and MIss Hua,got twins without getting merried.what did they call name them?

ans:

jo hua,so hua

get someone to marry me

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i`m getting  married next week there will be a small party and only few people will be invited don`t bring any gift.just someone to marry me.