It has been back to school for me for what have been several weeks now... It was really fun getting to hang out with friends everyday, hehe, Anyway, we released a copy of our school newspaper wherein there was an article about this professor which was 100% credible (i checked out everything in the article) that was written by a co-writer of mine. unfortunately, the professor in the infamous article came barging in our publication office and threatening to sue me for libel since i am the editor-in-chief, hahaha, i really couldn't care less because i was absolutely sure she'll lose if she does, but she was bawling and casting blames and i doubt she'll try to hear me out if i try to explain, so i just listened to her ranting and raving like a good student. =) Anyway, after she poured out everything, she left and a week after, my english professor confronted me in front of my whole class about the bloody article since she was a friend of the infamous professor. damn! but i gave her one bloody setdown, i just hope she doesn't take it out on my grades... hehehe, no one will believe her if she fails me anyway, i excell too much in her subject to fil in it.. do i sound arrogant? i hope not...
Hmm, we also had an election for the engineering students today, and out of all the goddamned position i could have acquired, i ended up being the MUSE!! and i was the only one nominated with everyone voting for me, hell, i don't even have a bloody idea of my nominator's identity... and hope he prays it'll stay that way, cause i am going to give him an accounting for what he did!! but, well, what can i do but accept the position gracefully. so now i'm no longer just being called princess and shinx, but now i'm also tagged as muse... aw hell!!! =)

Loathing heart

Heavy feet

And a weary grin

Ramrod stand

Brave smile

A dose of insulin

Extinguished light

Anguished tears

A cat for the killing

Diminishing hope

Without control

Self-consoling

Soul hollow

Thoughts running

Time is escaping

Losing grip

Grasp slipping

Continuously falling

Sodden heart

Dulling eyes

Nerves are wracking

Voice shaking

Speech failing

Gasping and Stuttering

DREAMS SHATTERED

CHAOS STARTED

LIFE ALTERED

FALTERED

Suffocated. I can hardly breath… Nauseated. I’m a reluctant passenger being driven round and round and round in this pointless dilemma. Gasping and stuttering, as I try to utter something that will stop this madness that is taking hold of everyone. Like a corpse trying to get out of its grave I try in vain. And then I pause. I started thinking… if I gathered my courage to bellow everyone to stop what he or she is about, would somebody hear me? Moreover would they listen? Pay attention? Will I touch a cord? Or am I just to be ignored? Like a vermin on the ground that no one pays attention to. Am I thus to be treated? An insignificant existing being? That no one bothers to attend to my cry… Why then would I burden myself with the weight of something that doesn’t even take notice of my efforts? Still I try and I try… but alas! Up to no avail.

                        There are times when I have this notion that the world is like a roller coaster that’s spinning wildly out of control. I see people staring open-mouthed at the turmoil that’s happening around them and I just want to shout for them to do something, for them to stop that wild rollercoaster ride with those poor unwilling passengers. Don’t you feel like maybe you could make a difference? Like somehow you could stop this madness that’s taking a hold of our world? Haven’t you ever felt frustrated that you can’t do anything to change the condition of our world? I really don’t know about you but if you’ll ask me, don’t you think it apparent what my answer will be?

                        When most people are asked what their wishes are, they quickly claim “WORLD PEACE.” But do they mean it? Are they really committed to the wish that they have uttered? Only they can tell… but if they do mean it, I bet they have experienced late night thoughts on how they could help stop. Have you ever wished so hard that you could make a difference? That somehow you could change the world… for better? It’s almost like wishing for a fairy tale to come true. But still I wish, harder than I’m wishing to be rich and famous that I could “make a difference” in the lives of all people.

                        So here I am, with stiffled cries and muffled voice, weak attempts and funny verses. I am still trying to make a difference in the lives of people. I am not however doing this to prove something, I am doing this to add meaning and purpose to my life. Yeah! I know it’s cliché but I want to be remembered long before I’m gone. So mark my words… because I’m gonna make a difference in the world. 

                        And to those people who are like me who are trying still to be heard. Maybe you could all gather your courage and join me. Maybe we could all jump off a building (people do love spectacles) then maybe after this simple insane act they would learn to listen to what every individual has to say.