Monday,Apr 25 2005, 09:59:52 PM[update] on yet another note, i updated my...

[update]
on yet another note, i updated my last entry, if you havent noticed. scroll down to read.

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路係自己揀既。

有些時候﹐其實連感情路都可以是自己選擇的。
只要告訴自己將精神放在哪個人身上﹐就會對她/他愈來愈有感情。

不過﹐有些人卻能讓你很容易產生感情﹐
有些卻需要很多時間培養﹐卻又在一瞬間就消失了。

Sunday,Apr 24 2005, 12:45:20 PMthe TCSS semi formal was so great. it was...

the TCSS semi formal was so great. it was lots better than i expected it to be. i didn't even plan to dance that much. best part of the night was challenging the dancing queen and the surrounding audience watching. ghetto ray went out to challenge her too after i did. i kept getting picked out by her over and over again to come out to the middle between her dancing with other ppl. :D i totally didn't expect something like that.. very high and no drugs involved >=) man, ghetto ray is so hella better tho (IMO), i need more practice. (like i would) i love the way she doesnt talk/doesnt have to talk at all... even when she tries to get me to come out to dance. all she has to do is to use gestures and her dance moves on me to get me to come out. i dont even know why i felt the urge to respond to her moves even when i wasnt going to dance anymore. and then there were the "twins" girls. they aren't really twins (uh... i'm guessing) but they dressed in the exact same outfit. they also danced pretty well, tho not even half as good as the one above. (it seemed like after dancing queen left, they became the 'hot spot'... saw them climbed up on top of the stage and started dancing there. i wouldn't know, i left right after the queen did) and if i'm not mistaken, those 2 should be the prettiest girls among everyone in the whole night. i was able to join them for a while.... but sadly didn't get to talk to them and/or ask for their names. being single = TOO GOOD! man... it's nights like these that makes me cherish being single. 喪玩!! party at Fung's place was good too afterward. i didn't really play much stuff tho... and didn't really drink much either. too bad i had to drive =( next time i'm so going in someone else's car and just get dead drunk and just have someone carry me back home. many interesting events during the night.... kevin he got dead drunk and threw up for 3 hrs in the bathroom.. 'confessed his feelings' to apple after getting drunk... amy laughing and crying badly... ghetto ray got so drunk he couldn't feel anything and fell after 1 punch from me (while i took at least 10 punches from him) (yes, we were boxing)... ppl not used to drinking like jenna and leo got so red after like a sip of vodka.. me getting pulled down by the 3 girls to get more alcohol since they aren't 21... -- just did haircut for ghetto ray. turned out so great! next one should be jay... this is so much fun. oh, various ppl have now seen ray's haircut, and they all had good things to say about it. i'm slowly getting my name out as famous hair designer in davis >:D btw, ray put a pic of his new hairstyle on friendster, so check it out if you want.. this pic is gonna go on my hair designer "portfolio" :D

Friday,Apr 22 2005, 05:33:56 PMalmost got into a car crash again today when...

almost got into a car crash again today when driving to work. here's what happened. (sorry bad pics quality, i drew it with MS Paint at work)

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wouldve crashed right into the object and the car in front of me if i didn't switch lanes fast enough. luckily i wasn't following very closely and had time to switch. time to add some details now that i'm back home and have time. so it was good that i wasn't following the car in front of me closely. it's really further away than the pictures i drew shows. but the thing is, the truck on the lane on the right was braking too, and pretty hard at it. so within that second i had to make the decision between 1) stopping in time in front of the object + crashed car? and hope that the car behind can also stop in time to not hit me 2) switch lane and hope that i can brake fast enough to not crash into the truck in front, and hope that the car behind me doesn't switch before me and not brake fast enough and hit me. thanks to the regular street fighter gaming i do (seriously), i'm actually trained to be pretty good at observing + thinking + making a decision in a very short time. checked to make sure no cars were behind the truck, and then observed the truck's speed to make sure that i can PROBABLY brake as hard as the truck was at that moment. so i decided to switch. after all, that was the safer move because even though i CAN probably brake before i hit the object/crashed car, i can't be sure that the cars behind me can. and even if they are fine, if i'm stopped there i'm not going to be easily getting out of that mess, and then when cops come i'll be involved in the car crash and all. and here's the ironic (for him)/lucky (for me) part.... about 5~10 secs before this happened, the car in front of me was actually behind me. and he cut in front of me probably because he thought i was going too slow, even though i was going at 80mph. in fact, if he didn't cut in front of me, the object would've hit me and i would've been the one to crash. i don't know why but when this happened, my mind was actually pretty calm. a few moments after all of that, my legs started shaking (damn, i sound pretty weak don't i) and i had trouble accelerating with my foot (don't laugh... it WAS scary after all =/). but still, my mind didn't feel that scared. why is this? was i still not fully awake yet or what? or am i too good at staying calm now even though my body is alarmed and scared, my mind is still calm? -- remember the parallel universes theory i wrote about before? if we use that theory... i think in another parallel world, this is the day i would've died. in this one, fortunately, i got lucky and got over it. i mean think about it... this is a chinese thing.. but. just 2 days ago i had that ghost encounter experience.... and then today, there's this. in old chinese myths, people have some kind of interactions with ghosts before they face their doom.

Friday,Apr 22 2005, 06:24:10 AMmy mood is very mixed and messy right now. i...

my mood is very mixed and messy right now.

i noticed something interesting from art2 on wednesday. we were doing washes and contours with ink (basically, use the brush thing and do gesture drawing from black ink mixed with water [for different shades of grey] and then draw contour lines over the gesture drawing). when we were done with our drawings we posted it on the classroom's wall for everyone to look at.

i found out that you can kind of tell how a person is feeling when doing the drawing. i noticed a drawing that looked like the person was happy when drawing it, because of the way the washes are colored. i noticed a drawing that looked like the person was excited when drawing it, because of the way the strokes looked. then i looked at mine comparing to the others. it's entirely different. it's very calm and quiet, almost sad. it feels so calm as if the person was emotionless when drawing it.

which is really the opposite of what i'm feeling now. i have such mixed feelings now, and my mind is very messy. but i do admit, when i'm in art class and drawing, i am able to lose myself pretty well and focus on the drawing. at the moment when i'm doing the drawing, it was really all my mind was thinking about.

just for this reason, i don't regret taking art2 this quarter. (even tho materials costed $80, even tho i have to get up at 8 every mon/wed for it...)

on another note, on tues/thurs at 10am i also have archery, as some of you may know. we started actually shooting this week, and it's been extremely fun. i'm taking this with kenneth, and having someone to play around/fuck around with also adds a lot of fun to it. for example, today, during our last series of shots, on our last arrow we decided to compete and see who can shoot the arrow further away. so while our instructors were standing behind us, we were obviously not aiming for the target and putting the bow like 30 degrees upward (well thats him, i had mine at like 15 only because i didnt want to look too obvious). i guess the instructor was talking to the TA and didnt notice tho, when both of our arrows fly way up too high above the target to the grass behind.

archery is loads of fun, too.

oh, i still didn't mention why my mind is messy, did i. hmm... i don't think i'm gonna.

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in other news, i had a load of plans tonight originally, such as plans with several different friends for dinner/movies at first, or to do haircut for eric and/or jay, or to go to arc, or to call somebody to talk, or even just to try to fix my computer to work with the WoW patch.... by the end of the day i actually managed to not do any of those and just stayed in my room all night. it kinda sucked, but at least i'm sleeping early.

i kinda understand how lulu feels about wasted fridays now. but, i guess i don't really feel that bad. i don't know. everything is so bland to me now. there isn't anything anymore that i feel really excited about, or to be extra happy or upset about. it's so apathetic. (right word usage? i learned it from Onyi's profile..)

i guess i did learn a lot from Gallen Law's character from the tvb drama "Wesley". i only saw a few episodes of that but this scene/quote i remember clearly...:
"i don't think you'll live long enough to be able to see sunrise tomorrow..." said the doctor when checking the poison inside Wesley (Gallen Law)'s body
"oh, well, it's not that bad. at least i can still see sunset today." said Wesley.
if only everybody can be as optimistic as he is...

in any case, i think i am getting close to being like that now.

Wednesday,Apr 20 2005, 07:21:07 PMsomebody said i look like an art major today...

somebody said i look like an art major today =) (it was during class, when i was drawing something. so that means i draw good! :D)

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scary thing. this morning i woke up once at like 7. i opened my eyes and i could've sworn i saw that my computer monitor was on and there was some weird window opened on the screen. i could even see the desktop and the icons. i even wondered why the screen didn't go auto-sleep after being idle for so long. then i finally woke up for real at 8:00 and i saw that the monitor was off. i have no idea.... and i'm fairly sure no one has entered my room during my sleep because of the way it's set up (i would notice if anybody did).

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in another news, my left eye feels some pain again. but it doesn't look like it's the same thing as last time (the inflammation), because this time it actually hurts, and i also know exactly when it started (yesterday afternoon when i was lying on the bed and it suddenly just came). i'm thinking it's a pimple. but then again, a pimple could evolve into something worse. let's hope that doesn't happen again because i don't want to have to do a surgery again. why is it always my left eye? i hope my left eye doesn't see ghosts.

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一般測試中得知 我機智
處理庶務與人事 我精於
坊間一百本好書 我是博士
我有過百好處

自給自足 是可以
十億年薪 不會滿足一輩子
生活都不缺 心頭只想望
披嫁衣

即管揭穿我 諷刺我毫無大志
我無名指 只想多一隻戒指
如明白我 滲透我內心深處
看似剛強 實質小女子

即管貶低我 諷刺我難成大器
今非昔比 始終需要愛情包庇
無人受理 領教了慘遭拋棄
我再精明 卻得不到你